i’m just hoping that this too shall pass. if i come out of this i will be a stronger person than i was before. something has definitely changed in me and i feel like a new person. i am willing to quit some of the habits that i picked along the way and be a better person. i will not go back. i mean its only been a week but i feel like it has been the longest time of my life. in this one week i have learnt what heartache is coz i have felt it inside my bones. in this week i have cried more tears than i have half the year. in this one week i have felt pain and oblivion that comes with sorrow. i have missed the bright flowers and rainbows. i have felt a hollow in my soul. in this week i have realized that i too could go through shit that i never expected. and i am praying that i overcome. i have felt the weight of age. i have felt lonely, weak and sick to my intestines. i have lost the will power i collected in this twenty years. in this week i have walked through hell and back. i faced the devil and came out with a smile. i have known what feeling alone in a multitude feels like. i have known that repurcussions exist. i have touched agony with my lips. i have watched my fingers shake. i have been treated like garbage. i have felt the taste of sweat in my throat. i have walked under rain and felt it no more. i have seen my life fade into nothingness. i have missed my face on the mirror and failed to hear my own voice. i have collected my million pieces of life. i have seen a human being turn into a monster. this has been the worst week of my entire life. but i still wont give up. i will hold on to this little thread of hope, that flicker of light i see from far, that distant voice, that smile that is a thousand years away.
just a week